Surrender Song

Today, the sky looked like a child ran across it with a kite leaving traces of pink dust. I held my breath and realized that I was alive. Still breathing. That was more than enough. A young woman at a cafe sat hunched like a tear from a lonesome lover. In her solitude I saw my own. In my seeing, I became less alone. What is it about wars and these almost-endings, that make us fall in love with the world ferociously? When the world turns black, beauty reinvents itself like a new language on my husband’s lips. And my hair stretches like wild branches in the ether, dropping apples and figs in strangers’ palms. I thought optimism was for the naive and foolish. Every time I crumble, Grace finds me and reminds me that I have a name.

I have been to the depths of the ocean. I have counted the mosses and all their colors. There were days when my grief was a wave, swallowing the shore and everyone in it.

Today I am a leaf, I go where the wind blows.